What is the first thing you should do when a parent dies?

Get the death certificate process started through the funeral home, notify close family members before posting on social media, and secure the home if the parent lived alone. Order 10-15 certified copies of the death certificate — every bank, insurer, and government agency requires an original.

How many death certificates do you need?

Order at least 10-15 certified copies. Each bank, insurance company, and government agency requires its own original certified copy. They won't accept photocopies. Running out mid-process causes significant delays.

What bills need to be paid when someone dies?

Mortgage/rent, utilities, and insurance premiums should continue to be paid to protect the estate. Cancel subscriptions (Netflix, gym, streaming services) as soon as possible. Other debts are generally handled during the probate process by the executor.

How do I find all of my parent's accounts after they die?

Search for bank statements in mail and email, check old tax returns for interest and dividend income, look for recurring charges on credit card statements, and use the NAIC Life Insurance Policy Locator (free) to find lost life insurance. Check unclaimed property databases at unclaimed.org for each state they lived in.

What to Do in the First Week After a Parent Dies | MyLifeLedger

The movies get this wrong. In the movies, death is followed by a somber will reading in a wood-paneled office. In real life, it's followed by paperwork. And phone calls. And hold music. While you're still in shock.

This guide is for people who are in it right now — or who want to make sure their own kids never have to figure this out under fire.

One thing before we start: Not all of this has to happen in week one. The first 24-72 hours have genuine urgency. Most financial and legal tasks can wait 2-3 weeks. You have permission to breathe.

In the First 24-72 Hours

Get the death certificate process started

The funeral home handles this — it's one of the few things that happens automatically. But here's what surprises people: order at least 10 certified copies. Maybe 12. Every bank, insurance company, and government agency wants its own original. They won't accept a photocopy.

Call family before you post anything online

People should hear this from a voice they recognize, not from Instagram. Have a list of who needs a direct call. Then, and only then, handle social media.

Find the funeral preferences — fast

Did your parent pre-arrange anything? Cremation or burial? A preferred funeral home? If you don't know, you'll be Googling 'funeral home near me' with shaking hands while someone on the phone quotes you prices. It's a vulnerable moment that a little preparation would have prevented entirely.

Secure the home if they lived alone

Lock it. Stop the mail. Check the stove. Don't throw a single thing away yet. That pile of junk mail might have a bank statement in it. That old coffee can might have cash or a spare key. Nothing gets tossed until you've gone through it carefully.

In the First Week

Find the will

Check with their attorney first — that's where wills often live. Otherwise: the home safe, a fireproof box, a filing cabinet. The will names the executor, which is the person legally allowed to do everything that comes next. Without it, you're going to probate court cold.

Notify Social Security

If they received Social Security, report it immediately. Payments made after the month of death have to be returned. The funeral home often does this, but confirm. Don't assume.

Contact the banks you know about

Walk in with death certificates. Ask to start the estate process or transfer process depending on how the account was set up. If you don't know which banks they used, look for statements in the mail, old checkbooks, or saved emails.

Look for life insurance

Check for a policy document in their files. If you can't find one, check bank statements for recurring premium payments. If you still can't find it, use the NAIC Life Insurance Policy Locator at naic.org — it's free and it searches participating insurers.

Kill the subscriptions you can

Netflix. Spotify. The gym. These keep billing after death. Cancel what you can directly. For anything that requires logging in and you don't have the password, call the bank and ask about the specific charges.

The Part Nobody Talks About

If your parent left no organized record of their life — no list of accounts, no insurance folder, no "here's who to call" document — you are about to spend months doing administrative archaeology. Calling institutions you've never heard of. Sending death certificates to addresses you found in old mail. Wondering, constantly, if you found everything.

I've talked to hundreds of families who went through this. The ones who had an organized parent describe the experience as painful but manageable. The ones who didn't? The word they use most is "chaos." Grief is hard enough on its own. Nobody should have to do it with a clipboard and a stack of envelopes.

If you're reading this from the other side — if you just went through this and you're thinking "my kids are not doing this" — that's exactly why MyLifeLedger exists.

What to Do in the First Week After a Parent Dies